March Resolutions: Take Yourself Seriously

March 1, 2013 by 4 Comments

Over champagne toasts, and speeches celebrating newly engaged friends of ours last night, The Fella and I were asked over and over again at a party how we met.

We met on the Internet. Surely, this was not how I expected the great romance of my life to initiate, but I’m thankful nonetheless. Once the getting-to-know-you stories were finished, what took place was a barrage of Internet dating war stories. It would seem that we were not alone in our endeavor, and the couples we were chatting with shared their own stories of awkward conversations and all around strange folks. I couldn’t help but think back to all the clichés on dating profiles: beach walking, liking to stay in and go out, loving fun, and not taking oneself too seriously.

Which got me thinking. What’s wrong with taking yourself seriously?

Surely, being able to look at yourself and your life as something worthy of shrewd observation and serious effort does not exclude the possibility of a sense of humor and the loving of fun?

Obviously, this sent me down a dark and winding path of introspection. Perhaps it was the champagne. Perhaps it was the Percocet. Or, perhaps it is the timing in my life. But, whatever it was one of my favorite literary quotes came to mind. I may not always agree with Ayn Rand’s social philosophies, but she is a great writer, and often times spot on about self-actualization.

Learn to value yourself, which means: to fight for your happiness.

~Ayn Rand

That quote pretty much sums up what I think it means to take oneself seriously. A concept I’ve certainly battled for much of my life. There is something about our culture that instills in us, particularly in women, that it is selfish and gluttonous to focus our time and efforts on ourselves, our own happiness, and our own success—whatever that means to each individual.

I have undoubtedly been on the receiving end of that judgment, and I have been the one doling it out. Neither is particularly good for the soul.

One of the reasons I renew my resolutions each month is because I am on a constant quest to be a better version of myself. Sometimes I stumble. Sometimes I achieve things that surprise even me. More often than not, I fall right back into just trying to survive the tide of life.

This month I’m resolving myself to a mantra instead of specific goals.

Take yourself seriously.

 

What are you resolving for March?

 

Kim

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February Resolutions

February 2, 2013 by Leave a Comment


Every New Year I create a vision board for my yearly goals. Some of these I’m working toward incrementally, like a veggie based diet, some I’m going gang-busters on—like exercise, and attempting to dress like an adult.

Usually I post my New Month’s Resolutions on the first of the month, but thanks to a Benadryl and a glass of Chardonnay I slept through the first of the month. Looks like February is starting out with a bang!

Usually January is a month for new beginnings, but I still had some straggling old things that needed tending…and a broken big toe that took a wee bit of time to heal. My toe is healed and my schedule is clear, now it’s time to focus on all those shiny new goals.

For starters, I’ve mentioned that I put on a bit of weight over the last year, as I spent my days glued to my computer and taking frequent breaks to eat my feelings (hey, writing a memoir is an emotional undertaking worthy of a few thousand cookies a day). One of my resolutions this month is to start focusing on peeling off some of that weight before my book comes out in July and I have public appearances to make.

In order to initiate operation Hot Author, this month I will:

  • Pre-plan my meals. Whenever I’m looking to lose weight I find meal-planning to be a hugely helpful tool. Sitting down the night before to plot my meals and snacks eliminates all those dangerous moments spent rummaging through the refrigerator and pantry looking for something to sate me. Also, I spend a lot less time thinking about food when I already have a game plan at the ready.
  • Sixty minutes of cardio a day; six days a week. Remember that I work from home, which can sometimes mean never standing up. Taking 60-minutes to cycle/run/or stairclimb will ensure my metabolism at least makes some sort of effort to behave normally.
  • No Carbs after 7pm.  Expect to see a lot of omelets for dinner.

In other non-body related resolutions, in February I will:

  • Book binge! I usually read a book a week, but in the last six months I’ve averaged about a book every two months. It was like there wasn’t enough room in my head for more words. Now I’m back to reading for pleasure.
  • Actually start studying for my personal training certification. I have no excuses now.
  • Start applying to jobby-jobs again. I have an idea about what I want to work on for my next book, but I think I need a break. Now, I’d just like to make some money and get out of the house.

That’s my February. What are you resolving for February?

 

 

Kim

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December 2012 Resolutions

December 1, 2012 by 1 Comment


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The end is upon us. [Cue foreboding organ music]

If the Mayans are correct, we’ve got another week and a half left on the planet. If, however, they end up being wrong there’s a lot of life left and that means onward and goalward.

The last 11-months have been all sorts of mentally and emotionally exhausting; a true lesson in be careful what you wish for. I’ve decided to take December easy on the personal goals and resign myself to wrapping up loose ends.

In December I will:

  • Finish any remaining book edits.
  • Make the new www.kimberlyraemiller.com a live website. If you go to my personal/professional website now there are filler images up, but this doesn’t reflect what the new site will look like. I’ve spent the last few months going back and for with my web designer to work on and approve new design elements and content. I’m hoping to have this live before January 1, 2013.
  • Work out a study/testing schedule for the ACSM personal training certification.
  • Pay attention to why I’m eating. In general I’m a scheduled eater; I eat three meals a day at regular times. I’ve tried for years to implement the five-small meal a day philosophy, but I can never remember to eat snacks or feel hunger at the appropriate times. Having said all that, the last few months have screwed up my hunger cues in a major way, and while I’m not going to worry about “dieting” I do want to pay attention to why I’m rummaging through the refrigerator. Am I hungry, anxious, or looking for a distraction?

This year has been an incredible journey for me, and as I ease out of it I want to make sure I’ve given each element a solid last effort before sending it on its way.

What are you resolving for December?

Kim

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2012 in Review

November 30, 2012 by Leave a Comment

With 2012 nearing its end I’ve been thinking a lot about how I fared on my 2012 New Year’s Resolutions.

There were some biggies that I accomplished, like selling my book and getting out of debt.

There were some personal goals that I did okay on, like steering clear of gossip. Sometimes it’s hard to know the difference between gossiping and general chit-chat, but this resolution has made me much more mindful of conversations that have negative connotations in regard to others.

2012 wasn’t all successful. I flat out failed at seeing my abs. Ha! My abs are so much further away from the surface than they were when I started this year. I blame book writing—I really ate my way through this experience. I also didn’t do very well with going gluten-free. In moving in with The Fella I upped my intake of veggie meats, most of which are made from vital wheat gluten. While I know there are some people who can successfully balance a vegetarian and gluten-free household, I didn’t have the wherewithal to restrict my eating on both fronts and since Roy is a vegetarian and we share our groceries, veggie food took precedence. I still think I’m sensitive to gluten, but sensitive isn’t allergic, and since I can live with the stuff I shall for the foreseeable future.

And then there’s becoming a personal trainer. That has been a goal of mine for many years, and now that my schedule looks like it’s lightening up I’ve stocked up on certification study materials. I even have a few potential clients in the works. If that’s not a motivator to plant my nose in the books I don’t know what is. While this goal will obviously bleed into 2013 I still say getting the ball in motion during the 2012 calendar year counts as successful.

The biggest disappointment of all though was that I didn’t learn how to ride a bike this year. Sigh, one day…

How have you done with your 2012 resolutions?

 

Breakfast


Bran flakes with banana and almond milk
Coffee

Lunch

No picture. I downed for a Peanut Butter Cliff Bar after the gym in between errands.

Dinner




It was a leftover extravaganza. Leftover veggie soup, leftover pasta and tabouli salads, and a couple of soy dogs thrown in for protein

Exercise: I’m working on upping my cardio in preparation for half-marathon training, so I did an hour of alternating runs and incline walks on the treadmill


Kim

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June Resolutions

June 1, 2012 by Leave a Comment


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Oh. My. God. It’s June.

Excuse me while I hyperventilate into this paper bag.

[heeeeeee, hooooooo, heeeeee, hooooo, heeeeee, hooooooo]

Okay, that’s better.

This June I am resolving to work really, really, really hard, and be kind, and maybe do my best about not eating junk food and getting to the gym regularly. But mostly, I’m just going to focus on working really, really, really hard.

I have two months to finish the first draft of my manuscript, a task that has been much harder than I originally anticipated.

Uh, next time I decide I want to write a book, someone remind me to not write one about myself!

I do apologize that my blog has become somewhat sporadic in posting lately and mostly consists of me having a nervous breakdown, but that’ll be over soon enough, and I can go on about my daily business figuring out how to be healthy and happy and not a maniac.

So, here are my resolutions for June:

  • Write at least 1500 words a day. My manuscript is about half done, which sounds cool, except for the fact that I only have two months to spew out the other half. I spent a good portion of the past four months writing and re-writing the same sections. I totally spiraled down a rabbit hole of rewriting and now I have get out and get finished.
  • Keep getting up at 6am. Operation morning exercise has been going well, and it has definitely added a feeling of accomplishment to my days. I may not be able to go as hardcore at the gym as I like, but if I can get there four days a week I’ll be happy.
  • Balanced eating. I’m not putting any crazy restrictions on my diet. Gluten, sugar, dairy, meat, etc will come and go, but right now all I care about is fueling my body and mind efficiently, without over fueling so I feel all bloated and gross while sitting at my computer ALL DAY.
  • FINALLY PAY OFF MY CREDIT CARDS! Contract signed and my signing bonus is on its way, which means after months and months of serious budgeting and lamenting about my credit card balance I can pay off my debt and live within my means again. Yay means. Count that New Year’s Resolution accomplished.
  • Blog more. The reason I haven’t been blogging much lately is twofold: for starters I’m insanely boring. There is literally nothing going on in my life that is not staring endlessly at my computer. Secondly, I keep running out of words by the end of the day. I’m going to try, really try, to not spew boring things out into the Internet, but to blog more nonetheless.

That’s about all I can handle. What are you resolving for June?

Kim

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May Resolutions

May 1, 2012 by 1 Comment

 

Hello May.

Welcome to my life. I have been waiting a long time for you come around with your warm days and cool evenings, blooming flowers, and subtle reminders that life is better spent under the shade of trees than just about anywhere else.

May is probably one of my favorite times of year, it’s not quite hot but it’s not cold either, which to me means one simple truth: dresses and cardigans.

I love dresses, dresses are like pajamas you can wear outside. Can we all just agree that the world would be a better place if we could all just wear pajamas all the time?

Cardigans are like a security blanket you can wear.

Put them together and instant comfort.

I’m also excited about May and hoping that this will be the month that I finally find a balance between work-me and life-me.

To say the past few months have been demanding would be an understatement, but I think I’m finally burgeoning on a place where I can balance being a human being and work. So that’s what my resolutions for May are about.

  1. Blog. I miss blogging on a daily basis, but I’ve often ended my days feeling like there are just no more words left in me. So, I’m going to make it a point to blog more (although I’m reticent to define what “more” means just yet), even if it’s just one meal, workout, or life philosophy at a time. I’m starting this goal out with a giveaway so you should come back tomorrow for the opportunity to get swaggy stuff!
  2. Take time to live in the present each day. A manicure, pedicure, hour with a book (that I’m not writing), or dinner out with friends—go a long way to take the pressure off. I’ve been pretty hard on myself lately, a habit that has probably done more harm than good to my work. I’m going to trust myself to work hard during the hours I set aside for working, but also take a moment or two to veg. Chilling out is an important part of life, a part that I often feel guilty about.
  3. Cut out the processed, but don’t count calories. I have a trip to Israel coming up. I would love to look fan-friggin-tastic in my bikini, but right now I can’t handle the pressure watch everything I eat and log countless hours of cardio. So instead, I’m cutting out the processed foods in my diet—many of which are the fake meats I keep around for meals with The Fella. And trusting my body to know when and how much to eat if fueled with the stuff it would find in nature anyway.
  4. Set a sleep schedule. I have not been sleeping well and this has become a huge problem. When I was a kid and couldn’t sleep my dad would say, “If you can’t sleep, don’t sleep—but rest and sleep will come.” I’m going to channel that advice, even when my mind is buzzing under the covers and I’m itching to get out of bed and start scribbling my thoughts, I will trust that resting will do my body good, and perhaps even lead to some sleep.

That’s it, my resolutions for May are about not being perfect, but being good. I will trust in myself to do the best I can, but not worry about doing everything perfectly. Sometimes good enough is the perfect goal.

What are you resolving for May?

Kim

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April 2012 Resolutions

April 1, 2012 by 2 Comments

 

Photo Credit:WeHeartIt.com

 

Can you believe it’s April already? We’re a quarter of the way through 2012!

Here in New York we’re fluctuating between summer-esque sun and winter weather. It appears that Mother Nature still hasn’t quite figured out what kind of spring she’d like us to have, and I have subsequently been dressed completely inappropriately for weeks now. It’s cold. It’s hot. It’s cold. It’s hot, but it’s raining. Hey look, it’s snowing. To be honest, the weather isn’t such a big deal to me—until early Fall I’ll be behind my desk typing. I’ve chalked 2012 up to The Year of the Recluse.

My life has certainly taken quite a turn this year, and while I feel unbelievably fulfilled on so many levels—I’m also going through a lot emotionally. Some of it has to do with book writing, and some is of a completely different personal nature. Balancing the really amazingly good with the heart-wrenchingly bad has had a significant effect on me. I certainly don’t mean for my blog to become “heavy central,” but I guess I am feeling a bit heavy these days, and because of that I have one very simple (or, not very simple at all) goal for April:

Honor my limits. For the majority of my life I have completely ignored any indicator that I cannot be any and everything I want to be—usually all at once. This moderately delusional behavior has led to quite a few accomplishments, but also a lot of tears, sleepless nights, and general anxiety. While I have come to accept my all-or-nothing personality, I’ve also realized very recently that there are limits to what I can handle. I’m not entirely sure I know what it means to honor my limits just yet (having never done it before), but I’m making it my goal this month to find out.

This is not the kind of resolution I can cross off of my to-do list and call it a day. There are steps though, and so this month I will make an effort to take them.

  • Sleep. I don’t get much sleep these days. In part because I’ve been dosing myself with enough caffeine and energy drinks to keep me awake well into retirement, and also because the sleep I do get is generally riddled with nightmares. In order to get said sleep, I think I’ve got to:
    • Nix the energy drinks. They’re so not good for you, and nothing I would recommend to the masses. It’s not in my character to take (or abuse) such things to begin with, but I’ve been pretty out of character in general lately. Caffeine sensitivity varies from person to person, and has a lot to do with body size and weight, and developed tolerance (much like alcohol, the more you drink of it the more you need to have an altering affect). Having said that, too much caffeine can be detrimental to calcium absorption—something that’s especially important as a woman. I’m not sure I’ll look back on this time in my life 30 years from now and think that my daily word count is worth osteoporosis. High doses of caffeine can also have deleterious effects on nerve impulses (hence jitters). Coffee does have some health benefits, and it’s my secret lover, so I’m not giving it up. But I think I can ditch the 5-Hour Energy Drink binges.
    • Chill the F-dge Out. Meaning actively partake in relaxing activities before bed. That means turning off the computer an hour before bed and doing things like meditate or journal.
  • Exercise. Fitness has always been a part of my life, and while I love to measure it by physical accomplishment (weight plates, reps, and miles), these days I need it solely for stress relief. I don’t necessarily have the same time every day to dedicate to exercise that I used to. Spending 2.5 hours to go to the gym, workout, and come back is a luxury I can’t afford these days. I can afford an hour. I need an hour a day to take care of my body. Plus, being accountable to my body has a contagious effect—when I exercise daily I tend to take more care of myself in other aspects of my life.
  • Eat for energy. To be honest, my appetite these days is almost non-existent. Every few hours I eat something because I’m pretty sure that’s a required activity. You’d think not having hunger pangs would mean I would focus primarily on healthy stuff, but lately I’ve just been eating what’s quickest to whip up, and getting back to work. This includes far more takeout and fast food than I have EVER eaten before. Methinks meal planning may be in order to both make sure I’m eating enough and eating food that will keep me focused and energized in this relatively stressful period. The good news, a good portion of this month is taken up by the Jewish holiday of Passover, which means that a lot of processed food is off limits to me anyway.
  • Sit still. Perhaps this is a lesson that others learn much earlier than I, but it’s not an easy lesson. There are things that need doing at times, that cannot be done in the present. I have heard (no, really, people have actually had to sit me down and tell me this) that life is long. The second part of this lecture usually contains some business about things having a way of becoming clear when it’s time for them to. I don’t know that I necessarily trust this whole life being long theory (because I’ve also heard that it’s short), but I do know that there are things in my life that seem completely outside my skill set. I’m hoping that trusting this whole time thing will help make things a bit clearer.

These resolutions have nothing to do with gluten, bike-riding, or word counts. But, they are the resolutions I need at this moment in my life. April is the Month of Limits, and I’m going with it. What are you resolving for April?

Kim

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Let the Home Workouts Begin

January 4, 2012 by 7 Comments

Baby, it’s cold outside.

I’m going to let you in on a little secret.  As soon as the mercury dips below 30 degrees, my workouts tend to happen at home more.  I love being a city dweller, and I can’t imagine living anywhere but New York (with the minor exception to Boston, but it’s even colder there!), but walking around in the winter can be downright painful.

With my legs as my primary form of transportation,  it can be really rough motivating myself to walk the mile-and-a-half to the gym on daily basis.

Yesterday hovered around 19 degrees, and I hovered around my living room doing a kickboxing DVD (review to come, want to get a couple more workouts with it under my belt).

Considering my New Year’s resolution is to get bufftastic, I’m going to have to make sure I get to the gym at least a few times a week for heavy lifting, the heaviest weights I have at home are 15 lbs.  But my guess is things like cardio and yoga that I can do at home are going to take place in my climate controlled living room.

The hardest part about working out at home is pressing play.  At the gym you have to workout because you’ll look silly standing around staring at the squat-thrusters.

How do you keep motivated in the winter months?

Breakfast

Smoothie made with low-fat kefir, frozen mixed berries, vanilla protein powder

Snack

Carrot cake protein muffin, banana

Lunch

Trader Joe’s Tom Yom Soup (not my fav, don’t think I’ll be buying this again–it has a weird consistency), added shrimp

Dinner

Sweet potato and lentil salad.  I have to admit I was a bit hesitant about a salad with granola, but it was yummy
Arugula, sweet potato, goat cheese, lentils, granola and lemon juice

Exercise: Cardio Day: 54-minute kickboxing DVD

Kim

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Nesting in the New Year

January 2, 2012 by 2 Comments

Say hello to my little friend.

Have I ever mentioned that I’m a wee bit superstitious?

I couldn’t help but take the lady bug in my shower on New Year’s Eve as a good sign about the year to come.

So far so good.

I’m not sure what it is about a New Year, but I always find myself reorganizing my life. It’s not a resolution thing; it’s a getting-all-my-slates-as-clean-as-possible thing. My day was rife with mopping, laundering, sorting, and donating. I have more slated for tomorrow—and I can’t wait. There’s nothing quite as liberating as purging your life of all those pesky ‘to-do’ list items that never get done. How long as it been since you cleaned out your underwear drawer? Why do I find this menial task so freeing?

It looks like I’m not the only one rocking a proactive attitude. Everywhere I went today, it was packed: the laundromat, the gym, the vegetable aisle of the grocery store.

Especially the gym. Holy treadmill hogs, Batman. I have never seen a gym that crowded, especially in the middle of the afternoon. One of the perks to my schedule is that I get to work out when the rest of the world is hanging out in a cubicle. My world was a bit rocked, but rocked in a happy way. It’s really inspiring seeing so many people so excited to make their health a priority. Having said that, I got my strength training on, and got the heck out of there as quickly as possible. Instead of the run I had been planning, I opted for a little Wii Zumba.

Umm, it was awesome.

If you have a Wii, like Zumba, and you don’t feel like an idiot dancing by yourself in the living room, you should get it. There’s even a spiffy harness so that you can wear the controller on your hips. I would say that the game is a wee bit lower impact than the class, but only by a small margin. I think I found my new guilty pleasure.

Breakfast


Scrambled egg whites, pumpkin spice protein pancakes, banana, and sugar-free syrup

Snack


Yogurt (with the rest of my breakfast banana)

Lunch


Brown rice tortilla, egg whites (this is right around the time that I realized I needed to go grocery shopping), lite cheese, and grapefruit

Post Workout

Whey protein and a mini Cliff bar

Dinner


Salad, lite ranch dressing, turkey breast

Exercise: 10-minute stairmill, 60-minute strength training, 45-minute Wii Zumba

 

Kim

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December Resolutions

December 1, 2011 by 1 Comment

I’m going to go on record and say that November 2011 was the worst, most stressful, uncharacteristically miserable month I’ve had in a long time. I, for one, have never been more grateful for a new month. Welcome to my life DECEMBER!

Lots of good things happen in December: trees wearing lights, cookies as a major food group, my favorite Winter Blend coffee at Trader Joe’s, and an excuse to don velvet. December is good times, and well, it’s the last month of 2011–it would be a shame to let the year end on a cranky note. That’s why I’m resolving to uncrankify this month by:

  1. Budget gifting. Last year for the holidays I went the budget route of homemade blondie mix jars. This year I’m going to stick with the same budget friendly theme and come up with some sort of homemade, yet delicious, gift to bestow upon those I love.
  2. Get through the holiday season without feeling like crap. I don’t know about you guys, but by the time January rolls in my body has been through what I like to refer to as the fruitcake wringer. A solid month of holiday parties and birthday dinners (the anniversary of my entry into the world is in December) usually means tight pants, zero energy, and some serious feelings of self-loathing. This year my goal is this: be as healthy as I can be this month without depriving myself of holiday awesomeness. I’ll compromise by consistent gym going and clean eating between festivities.
  3. Get 9-5 with my writing self. This past month was a blur of failing miserably at my commitments. I missed deadlines, called out of work, ditched friends and family, and completely forgot I had a blog. I need to set office hours if I’m going to complete all of the assignments I’m working on right now. Now that my parents are moved, my friends are married, Thanksgiving has been had, and my book proposal is back in for review—I need to focus on paying my rent.
  4. Yogify my life. A few weeks ago I was gifted a month of yoga at a studio in New York. I can cash in the gift anytime I want, and I was thinking of waiting until after the holidays were over, but methinks a little time on the mat this month would be good for clearing the cobwebs of my head.
  5. Enjoy it. Despite the hustle and bustle of the season, the crowded stores, and packed schedules this time of year is all about love. It’s about taking stock of those that you love, spending time with the people you care about, and showing the people in your life how much you appreciate them. The cookies aren’t bad either.

What are you resolving this December?

Kim

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