Bad Photo Credit: I found this on Pinterest, but can remember where. Eek!

Based on the crazy-whacked-out noises that my stomach has been making (in an extremely audible fashion), I can only assume that the monster from Alien is going to make an appearance soon.

I guess it’s a good thing I’ve been neglecting my ab workouts recently, it’ll give the little slime ball less fibrous tissue to work through.

Does anyone else suffer from a talkative tummy?

 

[Insert segue here] Last night I did something that I haven’t done in a very long time: I journaled (every spellcheck function I use says that “journaled” isn’t a word, but I’m going with it).

Between blogging and booking, I pretty much feel like my entire life is one big journal, but sometimes a little present-tense writing is in order. You know, something that won’t be published for all the world to see on the Internet (so obviously I’m writing about it on the Internet). If you’ve been reading me for a while, you may have picked up the fact that I really struggle with balance. My ideal self is just chocked full of pep talks about moderation and self-acceptance, but when it comes down to practice, my real inner monologue goes a little something like this: DO EVERYTHING. DO IT PERFECT. DON’T YOU DARE COMPLAIN YOU FRIGGIN’ PANSY.

Guys, my inner monologue is a football coach.

I took to journaling to quell some of the anxiety I’ve been feeling toward myself, because I can be really mean to me. While jotting down all the things I’ve been feeling insecure about lately: hours logged jogging, the astonishing amount of Chipotle I appear to be able to sock away, and my overwhelming (and often inappropriate) love of commas (and parentheticals)–I decided to read back in my journal a bit. I started this journal in the beginning of 2011. I was still working at the soul-sucking non-profit that had me breaking out in hives on a daily basis. As I perused the pages I realized something: I have everything I want.

  • I have a great job, working as solely as a freelancer and writing my first (but hopefully not last) book.
  • My parents are safe and healthy, and have moved to a wonderful new home (this is a BIG deal for me).
  • I have an amazingly group of friends.
  • I’m dating a super hottie, who also happens to be the most wonderful human being I’ve ever met (no, you can’t have his phone number).

At the beginning of 2011 happiness seemed so out of reach for me. I was, at that point, dealing with the aftermath of my mother almost dying, a breakup, and a job that often had me crying in my cubicle because of the cruelty of some of my supervisors.

The comparison: the overwhelming feeling of never being happy again, to feeling super anxious because I ate a burrito and spent four days working on the same paragraph, it all  seems so silly. I fired my drill sergeant. I’ve decided to enjoy every single moment of now…and to make time for some sort of exercise every day. Because, you know, burritos happen.

Do you journal? Do you blog (this would be a super good time to plug your own blog)(ßLook, more parantheticals!)? How do you overcome negative self-talk?

Breakfast


Egg white omelet with mushrooms and part-skim mozzarella
Gluten free toast

Lunch


Tall soy latte
Okay, this doesn’t really count as a meal, but I was in meetings all morning for a new freelance job, and when I got home I had a whole bunch of work to do. Lunch sort of slipped my mind.

Dinner


Tofu, bok choy, and brown rice.
Sauce: dashes of soy sauce, ground ginger, ground garlic, and pepper

Exercise: Turbo Fire DVD: Fire 30/Stretch-10