What we have here is the North American Kimberly. She is by observation a nomadic creature; oft seen carrying the entirety of her personal possessions with her from one location (usually Brooklyn) to another (the Upper West Side of Manhattan).
While it would appear that her natural habitat is anywhere that serves coffee and has free wi-fi, she has been seen of late taking conference calls in her boyfriend’s bathtub, the feminine products aisle of Duane Reade, in the gym locker room, and in the lobby of random office buildings.
Thrice daily this confusing specimen will stop to ingest some sort of overpriced food item, and will oft come forth with what can only be deemed a baby computer: a contraption she appears to be able to babble nonsensically into for hours–perhaps this is some sort of tribal ritual.
It can be concluded that the North American Kimberly runs around the wilds of New York City like vagabond crazypants in search of food, Internet, and a place to make a phone call.
The North American Kimberly is very tired and would like a nap.
Here is what she ate:
Her very favorite UWS diner happens to have amazing egg white and vegetable omelets, Internet, and very patient waitresses who will let her sit there until it gets super crowded and they need to turn the table.
The cashier at a prime lunch-time cafe apologized to her for ‘not remembering her name’ for her order. It has become evident that she eats there far too often.
At 10:30 pm it was brought to the creature’s attention that she had yet to eat dinner. Faux ice cream seemed like as nutritious a meal as any. This particular flavor: Snickers
Exercise: 45-minute Bosu bootcamp, 30-minute stairmill